Here are some leaked images of an Xbox-branded handheld and the Asus ROG Ally 2

Cough! Splutter! Sneeze! Excuse me, it's mighty dusty in here all of a sudden. Exceedingly dirty alleged leaked images of both the Asus ROG Ally 2 and what could be Microsoft's rumoured "Project Kennan" gaming handheld have burst forth from the tissues of the internet in a shower of dead skin particles and grime.

As reported by Videocardz, 91mobiles and Eurogamer, the images originate from the US Federal Communications Commission's official certification testing procedures. Which is why they look like they've been used as attic insulation, yes.

Two handhelds are shown in the images, each sporting prodigiously-sized grips. One has the Xbox logo just visible on a button by the left analog stick. That'll be the Xbox-branded one, then, though both are referred to in documentation as versions of the Rog Ally 2. As rumoured by Windows Central earlier this year, Microsoft appear to be collaborating with outside parties on their big break into on-the-go vidyagaming.

There are no final tech specs, but a quick zoom at each handheld's posterior suggests that the Xbox-branded one will have an AMD eight-core 36W Ryzen Z2 Extreme processor, while the white model comes with an AMD four-core 20W AMD Aerith Plus processor. Each has a seven inch 120Hz screen. You might want to compare and contrast all that with James' review of the original Asus ROG Ally, which he deemed "a viable alternative" to the Steam Deck that trades "some of the ease of use and battery life you get with a Deck" for "a nicer screen, more powerful internals, wider game compatibility, and faster storage".

Care of my Blade Runner-grade forensic scanning equipment, I notice that one of the leaked images also reveals something of the FCC working environment. You can see a small plastic Xmas tree on a filing cabinet in a corner. From this I deduce that either 1) these images were taken around Xmas time, 2) the FCC are pretty loose about tidying up their offices after the holiday season, or 3) the FCC are also road-testing small plastic Xmas trees.

It's possible Microsoft will air their Xbox handheld properly at their June showcase during this year's Summer Games Fest. Perhaps they'll take the opportunity to comment on the recent BDS boycott of their business links with the Israeli military, as well.

Some might find the dustiness of these prototype handhelds a turn-off, but personally, this is how I want all new computers to look - like potent, forgotten relics of a civilization that perished of disease aeons ago, after all the people in charge of basic sanitation got hooked on Balatro. I would watch a lot more Youtube unboxing videos if the unboxing process were akin to carrying out an archaeological dig. Imagine somebody like Marques Brownlee working the soil with a toothbrush for seven hours in order to get at the latest iPhone. You can have that idea for free, Marques.